After a few very very long debates with Sheldon El Cooper I though it was time for some light relief...because for me Friday is like a Superhero it always turns up just as I'm about to beat my collegue to death with my keyboard... 

So stupid but funny questions you have been asked...no you can't quote THAT thread!

Originally Posted by: hilary

I had a highly educated engineer in my office who needed new shoe laces for his safety boots.  I passed him the packet of laces and he asked me, in all seriousness, if he could have another packet so he could do both boots at the same time.

I just looked at him for what felt like half an hour with my mouth open (I'm sure it was only a couple of seconds)  while I tried to process the fact that this highly educated person did not realise shoe laces came in pairs.

Maybe he thought you'd given him a packet with two right-hand boot laces in it? Or two left hand laces, or foot maybe?

John

If you cannot use the top three steps on a ladder, why do they make two step ladders?

Not really a question but I had a maintenance request to investigate a handwash basin not draining away properly in a laboratory. The basin in question was in constant use and trouble free for many years, mostly people just rinsed their hands under the running tap. The problem? - Yep, someone had broken convention and put the plug in.....

Also whilst giving a couple of colleagues a lift into Cambridge across the frozen fens early one morning the sunrise was most spectacular. "I'm going to take a photo of the sun" said one waving her phone about at the window. The other got her phone out, looked out of the window thoughtfully then put it back in her bag. "I'm going to wait until we get a bit closer to it" she said.

I remember once when having installed a very complex and expensive metal forming machine in for a customer in the NE and having spent the best part of a week setting it up and training the operators I returned to my base in the midlands only to receive a panic stricken phone call that the machine would not work. Apparently it was completely dead. So I drove back the miles back to the customer and examined the machine. Yes, it was dead. Tracing the power cable back I found that it had been switched off at source. Once switched back on the machine functioned perfectly again. The customer had several trained maintence men and one had switched it off, but it had not occured to anyone to check.

Have you never experienced some of the tricks that used to be played on new apprenctices, like being sent to the stored for a long weight, or some tapwata paste? Or is it that I so old I can remember these?

I was once asked, "If I was struck and killed by the forklift, how much money would I get?"

I pointed out that he would get nothing, he would be dead.