Posted By Robert Fisher I know it's not a serious topic but it is the season of good will and just wondered if anyone has made up a joke risk assessment for Santa this year? It would be light safety entertainment for an xmas office party.

Posted By Ken Urquhart Robert, Heres some notes that I drafted last year as a PLEA from someone, Santa Claus "I Believe"!!!!!!!!!, desperately seeking help with Risk Assessments, Safety and Environmental issues, Human Rights, Employment law, Corporate governance, etc., etc., Seems to cover a lot! Might be of interest. A happy and peaceful Christmas and a safe, peaceful and healthy 2003 to all IOSH members, forum readers and contributors. Regards. Ken Urquhart. Hong Kong and UK. A "Once a year" opportunity:- The Organisation. A multi billion all currency world business headed by a single minded self-perpetuating ebullient and entrepreneurial Chief Executive Officer, aware of and prepared to address continually changing international demands on Corporate Governance, business ethics and standards of performance. Urgently seeks competent and professional Health, Safety and Environmental guidance and advice. Suitably qualified and competent individuals or consultancies motivated by genuine goodwill and desirous of equality for their fellow man are invited to participate. The headquarters premises of the organisation are geographically isolated. There is currently no significant infrastructure at the location making travel and access difficult. The climate is extreme in nature, subject mainly to low temperatures, regular heavy snowfall and limited natural daylight. Product and process covers a vast spectrum. It involves virgin design and manufacture including the use of local raw materials and substances as well as imported goods. Out-sourced finished products are also handled. These various articles and substances are further extensively re-handled, incorporated into or with other merchandise which is then re-packaged for ease of temporary storage, order picking and re-distribution. Storage facilities are vast and include temperature controlled and conditioned environments, and high bay warehouses. Manual Handling, mechanically assisted load transportation systems and often "one off" add hoc handling and logistics arrangements frequently arise requiring Risk Assessment preparation and revision along with the preparation and communication of safe working procedures. Much of the out-sourced product involves "home working". A substantial proportion of this manufacture and supply comes from third world economies whose Governments and producers are hopefully influenced by the benefits of their trade to help uplift work and non work-peoples alike, Health, Safety, Environmental and Welfare standards and expectations. Child labour is actively discouraged. Small capacity, multi-purpose domestic storage is used extensively and has to achieve environmentally, hygienic and healthy long and short-term weatherproof secret and secure storage. There is one short intense period of order picking and stock rotation annually. The production, which is subject to seasonal variation, must, amongst other issues, meet stringent local, regional, national and international standards for quality, environmental compliance, food and hygiene standards and requirements, chemical safety, user product and use safety criteria and international design, specification and multi - lingual safety labeling requirements. Intense customer driven product selection is the norm. Late change or specification revision imposes intense short-term annual pressures on the organistion and it’s supply chain resources and infrastructure. The traditional route of order placement is by word of mouth. This accounts for the largest percentage of demand. It also involves child safety and pre employment police screening of associated temporary and seasonal employees. Orders by mail are significant and require a sizeable receipt, sorting and processing resource. A Call Centre has been established to cater for the annually growing demand from telephone users. Advances in technology continue to generate strong and steady growth in Internet and e-mail communication. This has required the organisation to address all the vagaries of e-commerce including on line security, as well as addressing the implications of using Display Screen Equipment. All these requirements are further influenced by a high risk and intensely concentrated no fail delivery deadline window with severe penalty clauses. The current lack of a practical and easily obtained insurance product with economic premium means that these risks are presently underwritten on a self-assurance basis. A multi cultural, multi lingual equal opportunities organisation, we rely on an international army of outsourced stakeholders worldwide for our mainly seasonal manpower. There is a substantial logistics operation. It embraces animal husbandry and veterinarian needs within its sphere of operations as well as air, road, rail and sea transportation. The logistics also has special and significant vehicle operator and motive source interface and communication requirements. Access and egress problems abound. Those making delivery are required to maintain the lowest of profiles and ensure minimum interference with air space regulations. There must be no environmental pollution, noise, social disruption or neighbourhood nuisance. The potential for stakeholder stress and their exposure to seasonal rage or personal threat or violence is very real. Alcohol and drug related health issues arise and there are increased risks to personal health from eating disorders and food hygiene related illnesses. If amongst other attributes you are a competent, professional, Health and Safety Practitioner or Consultancy. If you are multi talented, psycologically and physiologically strong, a team player with language and computer skills, technical ability and understanding, capable of dealing with socio economic and neighbourhood relations, a good listener, have food and beverage experience, including catering arrangements for large numbers, education and child care experience, like animals and are generally a good all-rounder, then don’t miss out on this opportunity: - “KEEP the MAGIC” Make sure that on 24th December 2002 YOU hang up your Christmas Stocking containing your CV/Consultancy PR Notes and details of your expectations all clearly marked for the personal attention of “FATHER CHRISTMAS” C. December 2002./IOSH/Forum: Ken Urquhart MBE MIOSH MIIRSM

Posted By Paul Bellis Santa's Risk Assessment - Mr. Claus was having a bad day. Every other department was running on holiday schedule, and here he was working overtime. Most of the reindeer were down for maintenance and his elves were hung over. Just to make a bad day even worse, Mrs. Claus, otherwise known as "Northpole Six," was jumping up and down wanting to know where the risk assessment was for the next operation. Although she knew that Santa had executed this task countless times before, "Northpole Six" wanted to make sure he had thought everything out. She was well aware that the big things jump out at you while the little things bite you in the rear. She was also in no hurry to collect on his insurance, even though 11 months out of the year, all he was good for was taking up space on the couch and hogging the remote. Mr. Claus had initially tried to push the operation back some, say June-ish, but after a one-way conversation with "Northpole Six," he elected to stay with the original timeline. He had to admit that it's easy to lose focus during the holiday season, and it's tempting to take shortcuts trying to get the job done faster. Just last year, one of the elves was injured while operating a reindeer without a permit. Fortunately, the elf's injury was not serious, but the reindeer was somewhat traumatized and is still undergoing mental therapy. Going with the philosophy that it is easier to do something right than it is to explain why you did it wrong, Mr. Claus decided to break out the safety officers instructions and to complete his risk assessment. Once he had it done, he realized that it hadn't taken much time at all, and it had forced him to think of some hazards that he had not even considered earlier. the risk assessment form will not attach so I will post the columns for you to re-assemble - or I can e- mail direct HAZARDS IDENTIFIED 1 Limited Visibility 2 Improper Operations of controls. 3 Foreign Objects 4 Confined Space Operations 5 Manual Handling 6 Dangerous Landings 7 Electricity RISK AND TO WHO ? 1 Delivery Staff, passing vehicles - risk of collision 2 All staff and passing public - risk of sleigh crashing and causing injury 3 All operatives and persons below - struck by foreign matter 4 Asphyxiation of overweight operatives 5 Upper limb disorders and back injuries to operatives 6 All operatives and ground staff- collision 7 All operatives - shock ACTIONS ALREADY IN PLACE 1 Guidance controls in place 2 Use of Seat belt mandatory Speed limits to be adhered to (especially near speed cameras) 3 Helmet and Goggles used during flight 4 Ensure primary operator is in conformance with European Weight Directives - prior to conducting chimney entry 5 All operatives have received Training sack trolleys provided 6 Operatives to keep clear of reindeer when in motion 7 Ensure all portable appliances and lights conform to regulations RISK RATING M M L M H M L FURTHER MEASURES TO BE TAKEN TO REDUCE THE RISK TO AN ACCEPTABLE LEVEL 1 Fit Rudolph strobe 3 Designate Qualified ELF as Sleigh commander, driver to restrict consumption of alcohol to 3 units if driving -( Northpole 6 will supervise and give verbal advice) 3 Restrict consumption by Reindeer prior to and during flight operations 4.Limit consumption of mince pies during delivery 5 Consider use of Argos Vouchers as presents to restrict weight 6 Co-ordinate ground support to shovel snow off roof tops and disperse grit, watch out for other agents - see foreign objects above 7 Consider PAT testing any suspect appliance - or if PAT isn't available any other ELF to put his fingers in to test Happy Christmas everyone Paul Bellis

Posted By Paul Bellis Quite right Arron, I also forgot the risk of carbon monoxide poisoning fronm those faulty gas heaters, the risk of getting his nether regions singed from entering a chimney in use - would he need a permit to enter if it was in use? What about the working hours directive, does he need health surveillance as he is a night worker. RSI from repetative tasks etc etc - its a good job he is covered under the National ELF service as he is definately a health risk!

Posted By Paul Bellis I dont think so -they havn't got WHEELS ( Weils) but perhaps even so they may need a tachograph fitted - depends on the hours on the road or do they come under the Aviation laws?- just thinking off the hoof now ! Cheers

Posted By Andy Essex Santa Claus: Ergonomic Risk Assessment Let's get this straight: he's in charge of a flying vehicle and needs to deliver heavy loads to a critical deadline? We think it's time for an Ergonomic Risk Assessment. Name Santa Claus, aka Criscringle, Father Christmas, Father Frost, Joulupukki, Kris Kringle, Père Noël, Sabdiklos, Saint Nicolas, Sancte Claus, Sinter Klaas, Weinachtsmann General job description Santa Claus is employed for only two nights a year. His duties are as follows: Delivering presents from the Elves’ factory in the North Pole to all the good children world-wide Carrying out work whilst the children are asleep to avoid detection Delivering presents in a nine-reindeer flying sleigh Gaining access to premises from the roof via chimney. Payment in the form of tips (generally mince pies and sherry) Logistics of job Previous research has shown that: Santa visits over 1500 homes per second The average speed of his sleigh is of the order of 3.6 million miles an hour. The sleigh carries about 156,000 tonnes of cargo. Risk assessment and general health and safety requirements Vehicle It is Santa's responsibility to ensure that the sleigh is of good air worthy condition, carries all necessary documents and complies to all relevant regulations; failure to do so will result in prosecution and a fine, and or custodial sentence. As the sleigh passes through International air space all relevant Civil Aviation laws and rules must be adhered to: Registration and identification marks must be visible Seatbelts must be fitted and worn during take off and landing Emergency exits must be clearly marked, and clear of obstructions As all large bodies of water are to be overflown, life jackets must be carried Port & Starboard designation lights must be fitted. The glowing red nose of Rudolf is not an acceptable warning light for other air space users A fire extinguisher and First Aid Kit must be carried The Reindeers’ harnesses should be loose fitting so as not to cause chafing, be regularly checked for tear and wear, and replaced as necessary. As the sleigh has an open cockpit Santa must have suitable clothing to protect him from: Extreme cold of Northern Alaska Heat of Central Africa & Australia Decompression of high altitude flight, generally over large bodies of water Good quality shatter proof eye protection must be worn (insect or reindeer excrement strike at 2000 miles per second could impair vision). The extreme forces due to acceleration and deceleration. A full climate controlled outfit with integral ‘G’ suit is recommended, available from NASA and other specialist stockists Landing and taking off Landing and take-off permission must be sought from the relevant air traffic authority, as well as permission to enter or leave designated air space. Before landing Santa must sight the proposed area and check it is clear of obstructions, bearing in mind the sleigh takes up the room of 1500 houses. Large mirrors should be fitted to enable the rear of the sleigh to be viewed during parking. Care must be taken to avoid trees, overhead powerlines and chimneys. Chimneys should not be blocked as these must be clear to gain access to the houses. The landing area should be capable of supporting the 156,000 tonne vehicle. Collapse of any of the target houses would be unacceptable as the children would be woken. Ingress and egress of vehicle As the sleigh is parked on roof tops, most of which are in areas of temperate climates and have pitched roofs, care must be taken and a good quality working boot should be worn giving good ankle support for the sloped surface. For areas in the Northern half of the Northern hemisphere where the temperature will invariably be below zero, a good non-slip soled shoe (with possible crampon fitment for snowy conditions) should be worn. High visibility jacket and hard hat should also be worn. A support harness must be worn. It must be attached via a retardation device to a secure anchor point. For fragile roofs, Duck crawling boards must be used. Handling of presents Suitable training should be given to enable Santa to lift any heavy presents destined for especially good children. Special care should be taken when stretching to reach presents from the back of the sleigh. Clambering over the pile of presents should be avoided due to the unstable nature of the footing, this can be achieved by packing the presents in the order required. All dangerous materials, chemistry sets etc, should be suitably marked, have relevant COSHH sheets attached, and stowed in a flameproof container. Chimneys Care should be taken when entering the chimney. The use of ladders is recommended, and also the safety harness. Due to the dark environment, a lamp should be used (miner's type would be preferable to enable hands’ free usage). Respiration equipment and eye protection must be worn due to the dust, soot and smoke. All clothing should be manufactured from non-flammable materials, and be heat and flame proof as many of the chimneys will have lit fires below. Footwear should have asbestos or similar heat resistant soles. Care should be taken to keep the high visibility jacket clean. It is recommended that it is washed or changed regularly. Setting down of presents Care should be taken when entering the room. Dogs, security guards and surveillance equipment should be catered for. Attack by dogs can be prevented by the wearing of thick over-garments or even a decoy piece of steak. For surveillance equipment and security guards, Santa's own sleight of hand will have to suffice. Caution should be taken around Christmas trees which are normally covered in sharp needles and fragile glass baubles. If Santa's clothing is wet due to rain or melted snow there is a definite risk of electrocution with the Christmas lights. A rubber mat should be provided to prevent such a problem. Manual handling training should be given to show the correct way to set down large presents. Trip hazards should be looked out for, e.g. last year's discarded toys on the floor of children's bedrooms. Working hours With Santa's 31 hour working day, regular breaks should be taken, allowing time to eat drink and take care of calls of nature. Working with animals, the reindeer should also be given regular breaks for the same reasons. They should be allowed to graze frequently and be given time to stretch their legs. Santa should be trained in the flying reindeers’ special needs; little or nothing is known of this and research should be undertaken to discover their anatomical needs. Safety equipment All safety equipment should be checked and/or replaced each year to ensure optimum performance. In charge of a vehicle under the influence of alcohol Due to the means of payment this is especially important. It is recommended that a separate designated driver is employed. Due to the covert nature of these operations, one of Santa's own elves would be a suitable candidate.

Posted By Martin R. Bessant Thank you colleagues for such excellent risk assessments for Santa, but have you fully considered his mode of transport. Surely reindeer come under the Vetenary Regulations and will require frequent meal and comfort breaks. There must be weight restrictions on how much each animal can pull and have the RSPCA been asked to ensure the animal are not being stressed by making them work so hard for a 2 day/Year. I think it is high time that IOSH sends a deputation to Lapland to discuss the welfare needs of both Santa, The Elves and Reindeer. This is a task I would be happy to carry out as an IOSH Council Member as their representative. Please be aware that the National Elf Service is under severe pressure at Christmas and Santa's helpers might face long delays in Accident and Emergency. Extreme care in handling the childrens presents onto the sledge must therefore be taken to ensure Santa has no delays tonight! Have a superb Christmas, and thank you all for the very amusing threads which had me laughing out loud. Martin Bessant.

Posted By Zyggy Turek Andy, I just hope that the Inland Revenue are not monitoring this site as they will surely be drawn to the fact that Santa receives payment in the form of mince pies & sherry! They will obviously see this as a "taxable benefit" & require him to declare any such items for anything consumed within UK air space. Any such payment will obviously be backdated (to when?) & could lead to financial penalties & even a spell with HM Prison Service. I believe that we should all contact our local HSE (Help Santa Escape) office & offer our support.

Posted By Robert Fisher Thanks to everyone who posted a response. It has been quite amusing reading your comments. Wishing you all a very happy new year. Many thanks again