Posted By Paul Craythorne John, Here are the ones lifted straight from one of my accident investigation training slides (yours is in there) * accidents just happen * we don’t have many accidents * safety is expensive * the insurance will pay * safety is just common sense Regards, Paul Craythorne

Posted By Delwynne apparently 'It's 'elf & safety's fault we 'ave accidents 'cos we're not allowed to fink for ourselves anymore'

Posted By Peter Lee Another chestnut; Risk Assessment, whats that then, is it new?

Posted By Heather Aston "I'm calling from (insert catchy sounding name you've never heard of) and we'd like to rewrite your entire H&S system, do all your risk assessments and solve all your safety training problems. We think it'll take about a week. Oh and while we're there we'll test all your electrical appliances and put "do not use after date X" stickers on them to scare your entire workforce and we'll test all your fire extinguishers and tell you that you need half of them replaced because of new EC legislation outlawing the doubletalk valve. Despite the fact that you work in a relatively specialist industry, we all know far more about it than you do and we'll only charge half of your annual salary for all this work" Sound familiar? Heather

Posted By Ron Young Your risk assessment will identify all of the hazards etc... Oh yeah? We're a low risk environment... H&S is the H&S managers job.

Posted By Zoe Barnett Manager on being told that there were safety procedures to be used when transporting gas cylinders by road (and who had never attended any one of dozens of courses we offer): "Well how was I supposed to know it's dangerous?"

Posted By Richard Mathews My favourite from my previous employment came from a line manager in a heavy fitting bay after I told him he needed guard rails and toe boards fitting on 5 - 6 metre scaffold before work could commence. "They won't working up there long enough to fall off" ??????!!!! Or, how about the old classic: "This is the way we've always done it, and nobody's died yet" Richard

Posted By Arran Linton - Smith The classic statement I frequently hear within the Construction Industry is, “we av an excellent safety record, we’ve been going x number of years and never ad en accident”.

Posted By David Brede So no thought of sacking anyone who has an accident 5 minutes before they had it!

Posted By Simon Ayee "Why don't you visit X down the road - they're much worse than us?"

Posted By Kate Graham "We had a visit from the HSE. They didn't find much wrong. They told us that X was a problem. Well we already knew that - we've known that for the last two years."

Posted By Gerry Knowles Old Job: If it isn't safe to make or do we won't make or do it. Latest Client: Its going to cost how much? Gerry knowles

Posted By Laurie "It says in the Health and Safety at Work Act ................" Laurie

Posted By Pete Driver I suppose I'm alone in agreeing with some of these statements! Oh Nanny, where are you?

Posted By Stephen_S_Edwards "....well I am the one walking across this RSJ because I've got the most experience" Demolition Foreman working at 10 metres without fall arrest. "...but we've done it like this for years". Guy stood on the 3 metre high wall he was dismantling "...I don't need a competence card, I've got Grandfather rights" "...well I would wear them, but they just steam up all the time". Response to not wearing goggles using a cut-off saw (fairly common) "Abrasive wheels training?". See above "...they're in the van!". Response to the question "where are your safety boots?"

Posted By Robin B How about, from an FLT driver "I've been driving for 20 years, never had an accident and never shall"

Posted By Melanie Torrance As an LA inspector: Q: Do you have a first aid kit and accident book? A: What's an accident book? or A: We don't have accidents (followed by guffawing) Q: About the part in your letter where you said we need an accident book, I worked in the construction industry for years and I know that if there's less than 5 employees you don't need an accident book. A: *bangs head on table* No sir, you are mistaken.

Posted By Stuart Nagle 'We don't have accidents' 'We have unproductive incidents' 'I'm employed to manage the manufacture of XXXXXXXXX' 'Its your job to see we do it safely, not mine' 'Yes, yes,... but you can take this safety stuff too far you know' 'Yeah, I know he was'nt using XXXX, but he's an experienced guy and he's been on all the training courses' 'Oh.... I did'nt know the sign meant that' 'Yeah... of course we done a risk assessment'. 'Great, where is it?' 'Oh, we done it in our heads' Method Statement: "An operative will climb the tower, unbolt/disassemble the bracket and chuck it down to the operative on the ground and climb down" Method Statement: "our operatives will attend site, carry out the works safely and leave the site in a safe condition" 'I told XXXX the easiest way to do it, and the safest way to do it' 'He chose the easiest way which resulted in the accident' 'Experienced, of course I'm experienced, I've been doing this job for years'...... 'Permit to work?....what's that then' 'Have you ever used BA before mate?' 'Oh sure loads of times'.... 'So I guess you know you've got your BA set on upside down and you're just trying to test me out eh?'....'Oh' 'Did you test the atmosphere before the guy entered the confined space?' 'Oh yeah...no problems' 'And how will anyone know if the atmosphere gets bad down there?' 'XXXXX is an experienced guy' 'He'll smell it if it gets bad' (with monitor sitting next to manhole cover on surface - switched off) 'Have you tested the atmosphere in the confined space?' (with monitor sitting on surface next to tools) 'Oh yeah, done that' 'So what model of monitor have you got there?' (Picks it up to show me) 'So how does this work then?' (fumbles with all components and fails to switch on at all) 'So I guess you've not used one of these before then'....... 'Errr No, well er...not this type anyway'

Posted By Neil Evans It may be common sence, however, it is obviously in short supply. Look at how many accidents happen.

Posted By J Knight One of the few useful lessons I ever attended at school was an English lesson which considered an article about the roots of 'common sense', and how it is a manufactured concensus which is very often not sense, let alone, as Sheelagh says, not common. Still, that's all a bit philosophical for the average workplace discussion, John