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Safety Smurf		#1 Posted : 06 October 2011 15:40:41(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		As I've just learnt a very important life lesson so I thought I'd share it with you straight away. Don't try to eat a Sherbert Dip Dab if you're wearing all black!
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Thundercliffe26308		#2 Posted : 06 October 2011 15:46:43(UTC)
Rank: Forum user		Or if you have a cold and are sneezing !!!!
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safetyamateur		#3 Posted : 06 October 2011 15:58:53(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		Thundercliffe26308 wrote: Or if you have a cold and are sneezing !!!! In a shop containing lots of expensive ornaments
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NickH		#4 Posted : 06 October 2011 16:13:48(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		Safety Smurf wrote: As I've just learnt a very important life lesson so I thought I'd share it with you straight away. Don't try to eat a Sherbert Dip Dab if you're wearing all black! Says the Man from Milk Tray...
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sean		#5 Posted : 06 October 2011 16:40:50(UTC)
Rank: Guest		Never look at your watch while holding a cup of piping hot tea in the same hand, that's my tip!

moderator 5		#6 Posted : 06 October 2011 19:45:58(UTC)
Rank: Moderator		As it would appear that this Friday is being run on Australian Time we may have to ensure that it finishes in the same time zone. Take care, Safety Smurf, that Gargamel could turn up if this happens again. We can't have this example of a time warp proving the recent speculation that time travel is now possible and that therefore Friday can start whenever we choose. Of course if time travel is possible then eating sherbert dip dabs in all black would be possible without risk. Moderator 5
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BuzzLightyear		#7 Posted : 07 October 2011 08:48:56(UTC)
Rank: Forum user		Here's one. Don't turn off a kettle with your arm directly above the steam while slightly drunk after a stag night. Two weeks later, I've still got a rather gruesome burn on my arm.
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safetyamateur		#8 Posted : 07 October 2011 09:24:05(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		Can't see how a kettle can have anything to do with a Stag Night unless it's being thrown over a pub. How about answering a phone whilst ironing? Pardon?
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sean		#9 Posted : 07 October 2011 09:55:27(UTC)
Rank: Guest		Never trust Zyggy with his invisible PPE scam, I've been receiving boxes full of his new range of invisible PPE and have distributed it all accordingly, the lads in the factory are not happy they reckon the overalls are see through and the gloves are not protecting them at all?? I have a mini mutiny going on with the lads refusing to wear the PPE, and its costing me a fortune as Zyggy still has my credit card to fund the research which is obviously not working!! Where are you Zyggy???

NickH		#10 Posted : 07 October 2011 09:59:34(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		sean wrote: Never trust Zyggy with his invisible PPE scam, I've been receiving boxes full of his new range of invisible PPE and have distributed it all accordingly, the lads in the factory are not happy they reckon the overalls are see through and the gloves are not protecting them at all?? I have a mini mutiny going on with the lads refusing to wear the PPE, and its costing me a fortune as Zyggy still has my credit card to fund the research which is obviously not working!! Where are you Zyggy??? The Seychelles?
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martin1		#11 Posted : 07 October 2011 13:46:32(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		Safety Smurf wrote: As I've just learnt a very important life lesson so I thought I'd share it with you straight away. Don't try to eat a Sherbert Dip Dab if you're wearing all black! Johnny Cash told me the exact same thing.
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Zyggy		#12 Posted : 07 October 2011 13:56:14(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		Sean - I am deeply hurt by your unfounded accusations of a scam being perpetrated. The PPE was in top condition when it left the warehouse, & if it was a scam, surely you would have seen right through it? As for the Seychelles; how could you think it! Anyway, I am so upset that even looking through my window overlooking Platte coral island & watching my Aldabra Giant tortoise ambling along the manicured lawn will not take away the hurt, so I think that I will just go & top up the seed tray for my Seychelles Black Parrot....
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sean		#13 Posted : 07 October 2011 14:06:16(UTC)
Rank: Guest		Zyggy if I get my hands on you you'll be selling sea shells! Not invisible ones!

Zyggy		#14 Posted : 07 October 2011 15:23:47(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		Sean, This is really spooky...I am just about to launch a new range of ear defenders based on sea shells; conches to be precise! Although they do not cut out any noise, the sound of the ocean will take your mind off the problem. As you are a valued customer I am prepared to offer you a special price of £50 a pair, or a "today only" price of two pairs for £150 - what could be fairer than that? Please could you send me a cheque, signed & dated (I will helpfully fill in the amount) & I will rush them to you via my delivery service "Aircon". PS. did I tell you that I have also inherited £10 million, but due to certain restrictions need only £100k to access it & am prepared to cut you in for half if you sign over your pension rights....?
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Safety Smurf		#15 Posted : 07 October 2011 15:32:14(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		Hi zyggy, Just thought I'd warn you. Somali pirates have been spotted in the seas around Seychelles. Fears abound that they intend to hijack forum threads and hold them to ransom. ;-)
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sean		#16 Posted : 07 October 2011 15:42:50(UTC)
Rank: Guest		zyggy wrote: Sean, This is really spooky...I am just about to launch a new range of ear defenders based on sea shells; conches to be precise! Although they do not cut out any noise, the sound of the ocean will take your mind off the problem. As you are a valued customer I am prepared to offer you a special price of £50 a pair, or a "today only" price of two pairs for £150 - what could be fairer than that? Please could you send me a cheque, signed & dated (I will helpfully fill in the amount) & I will rush them to you via my delivery service "Aircon". PS. did I tell you that I have also inherited £10 million, but due to certain restrictions need only £100k to access it & am prepared to cut you in for half if you sign over your pension rights....? Zyggy i am really interested in your offer of the "conches" can you please supply me with 50 pairs i will send the cheque this afternoon, i am sorry that i will not be able to help you receive your inheritence just yet, the £100k isnt a problem its signing over the rights to my pension, i am affraid the last government and the present government have already had their mitts all over my pension and the pot is now empty! Sincere apologies, as a matter of interest has anyone else from this site made an order or even a quiery for your invisible PPE?

Zyggy		#17 Posted : 07 October 2011 16:01:20(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		Sean, Just getting the butlers & maids to collect the conches from the beach, err I mean warehouse, & they will be on there way to you as soon as I can get rid of some guys in a speedboat who are approaching fast. Strangely, nobody else has shown any interest in the PPE, yet there are so many advantages, e.g. light to wear, easy to keep clean & so easy to store - in fact you wouldn't even know you were wearing anything! I am in fact trying to do a deal with IOSH to supply invisible ties & scarves when Members renew their subscriptions & at £30 each, I believe they are a steal!
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sean		#18 Posted : 07 October 2011 16:13:20(UTC)
Rank: Guest		Zyggy maybe I just got a bad batch of PPE? I have to admit my first few orders were spot on and I had no complaints from the workforce about the safety glasses, did have a few nasty eye injuries to a few of my workforce but when I challenged their workmates they admitted that they were not wearing eye protection at the time of the accident, so it was their own fault, they wont do that again! I think the idea of the ties and scarves is great and at such a reasonable price, I don't know how you manage to keep your costs down to the bare minimum? Apologies for insulting you earlier and calling your reputation into question, I will double my next order as a way of some compensation for being so wrong!

PVZ		#19 Posted : 07 October 2011 16:21:42(UTC)
Rank: Forum user		I did place an order but have yet to receive a reply, perhaps I shouldn't have used invisible ink?
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Safety Smurf		#20 Posted : 07 October 2011 16:57:19(UTC)
Rank: Super forum user		PVZ wrote: I did place an order but have yet to receive a reply, perhaps I shouldn't have used invisible ink? I spilt some of that once......... took ages to clear it up!
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PVZ		#21 Posted : 07 October 2011 17:01:27(UTC)
Rank: Forum user		Safety Smurf wrote: PVZ wrote: I did place an order but have yet to receive a reply, perhaps I shouldn't have used invisible ink? I spilt some of that once......... took ages to clear it up! Gets everywhere, allegedly!
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moderator 5		#22 Posted : 07 October 2011 17:07:57(UTC)
Rank: Moderator		Time gentlemen please, Friday forum is now over, have a good weekend Moderator 5
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