Like many I'm sure, I've had a hard week and a bit disappointed not to see any humerus Friday Strand? I know it's not funny for the recipient, but a fine for a company specialising in equipment hire for safe working at height, injury caused when someone fell of the roof of a MEWP they were maintaining? there must be more odd ones?

Tickled my funny bone there, Tomkins. I was awakened at 06:30 with cramp in my right calf this morning - not a humourous start for me.

Well, I couldn't post here on Friday. Consultants here might smile at this experience I've had this month: My regular client (pays me for 2 days a week) introduced new processes, lots of hand-held saws, bandsaws and lots of noise spikes of decibels >90dB. Operators wear PPE but everyone else in the dept is suffering from the noise. So I asked the engineers to look at improvements to reduce the noise, screens etc. meanwhile I got on with proper monitoring with decibel meters, HSE calculator points etc. Daily recommended exposure to noise is exceeded within 4 hours on some days, all 20 employees in dept are at risk, so I got on with employee consultation, ensuring PPE is appropriate and is worn, conducted medical questionnaires, and of course one action I insisted on is hearing tests (Audiometry) for all affected employees. The tests will likely be done during one day and cost about £500. “Thanks John, for all this good work”, I was told. “Now, we want to keep to our H&S budget this year, can you come in just six days in November (instead of 8)?