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What a week I have had, let me explain....
I have just become a pensioner however I have to carry on working which involves a LOT of driving and I love Pasties! Have I been stitched up or what!
The budget robbed me, I am hungry and I cant get any fuel! Roll on next week......
What type of week have you had?
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Rank: Forum user
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Ha - The universe is a place of balance - what a week
Undertook a H&S review for a partner organisation in Mid-Wales, their H&S performance management wise hugely improved on a year before, followed by three days walking Welsh Hills with no rain (almost unheard of) to get back to the office and find a £1.9m grant bid successful and I still have a full tank of petrol, a freezer full of pasties, and my glass is half full.
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I heard on the news that people were panic buying, so I rushed out, and bought as much as I could. It turns out I got my news stories mixed up, does anyone want 74 cornish pasties, 30 steak slices and 45 cheese and ham pasties?
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Rank: Guest
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Rank: Super forum user
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I have followed goverment advice and have now purchased a jerry can and it's now filled to the brim with pasties!
As advised I will be topping up regularly.
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Rank: Super forum user 
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Sean – If you buy your pasty from a chip shop cold (so no Vat), ask for their waste frying oil to run your car on and use the heat from the exhaust manifold to heat your pasty.
Job done
Chris
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Rank: Super forum user
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I couldn't find any panic to buy. :-((
Andy
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sean wrote:SpaceNinja Vat free?
By the time all the pasties were bagged and put through the till they weren't hot, so I don't think they would have fallen into the realms of the proposed VAT. That said, I didn't take my probe thermometer with me so I can't be certain.
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Cheers Spaceninja, talk about rubbing salt in the wound!
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Rank: Super forum user 
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I drove all the way to Leeds (10 gallons of 4 star) to buy pasties as recommended by the PM, only to find he had been lying, as the pasty shop does not exist.
I'm now concerned that all the other things he has said might not be exactly true.
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Did anyone see the irony in where Ed Milliband was being interviewed about the fuel 'crisis' the other day? It was outside a Greggs branch.
And the irony of 'Government' minister recommending the filling of jerry cans when they want to ditch swathes of 'needless' H&S regulation?
At least it will be a conversation starter in the pub tonight...
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Rank: Super forum user 
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Apparently the UK poulation of Starlings has dwindled by 80% in the last 30 years! If anything, I think we should start panic buying Starlings!
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After queuing for ages, I managed to get served and now have a plentiful supply of pasties.
I was asked if I wanted a carrier bag for them, which would cost 5p (being in Wales). After carrying out a Dynamic Risk Assessment and concluding that the load was a manageable size and weight and that I had up to date Manual Handling training I said no.
I picked up the load and subsequently burnt myself on the hot pasties.
I am now meeting my solicitor to make a claim against the bakery for breaching their duty of care to me.
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Rank: Super forum user
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Safety Smurf wrote:Apparently the UK poulation of Starlings has dwindled by 80% in the last 30 years! If anything, I think we should start panic buying Starlings!
Or start breeding pasties in captivity?
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Rank: Super forum user
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Do Starlings prefer their pasties hot or cold
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Garage has run out of petrol, so filled up on pasties
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walker wrote:Do Starlings prefer their pasties hot or cold
Cold of course! the same way Swallows prefer Coconut.
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Rank: Super forum user
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Safety Smurf wrote:walker wrote:Do Starlings prefer their pasties hot or cold
Cold of course! the same way Swallows prefer Coconut.
Well in that case, I fail to see your arguement; the VAT increase on hot pasties isn't going to effect the starling population.
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Rank: Super forum user
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An optimist sees the glass as half full. A pessimist sees the glass as half empty. An engineer sees the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
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Rank: Super forum user
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Hot is a relative term, they mean above ambient temperature, so in winter when it is -10 outside your pasty would have to be frozen to incur no vat. I’m sure there has to be some health concerns over sucking frozen pasties. Not to mention the cost to small businesses having to provide thermal gloves to the shop assistants.
Starlings ?
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Rank: Guest
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So just when I thought my week couldn't get any worse I will now have to suck on frozen pasties?
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Rank: Super forum user
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sean wrote:So just when I thought my week couldn't get any worse I will now have to suck on frozen pasties?
Not at all. According to Chris you could suck on frozen Starlings instead. ;-)
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Just for those of a certain age - "ALBATROSS"?
Monty Python circa 1971.
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Rank: Super forum user
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Motorhead wrote:I couldn't find any panic to buy. :-((
Andy
Sainsburys had some this morning in the pasty aisle.
(other supermarkets may or may not have had panic but probably had pasties)
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Rank: Super forum user 
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According to a quick Internet search you can eat starlings, but apparently they need to be cooked. You can stew them with olives, but I guess you are back to paying tax on it, (then being prosecuted as they are protected in the UK)
But the recipe is below just in case you want to try.
http://archive.salon.com.../recipe_birds/index.html
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Rank: Guest
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Savoury Starling Stew.....Yummy, My Saviour!!!!!
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Rank: Super forum user
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I always abide by government orders, so I went out and bought some jerry cans and filled them with petrol.
Now I'm waiting for instructions on how to convert my diesel car to run on petrol...
Anyone else realising just how much of a liability Mr C is for this country (not just for H&S)???
Steve
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Rank: Super forum user
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I was amused at some local comments "However, in Orkney and the Western Isles, panic buying didn't last long when people realised the cost of filling a tank. It slowed down as quick!"
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Rank: Super forum user 
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Smurf - i was always told that 'tits like coconuts' - sorry mods I bet that gets pulled!!!
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Rank: Super forum user
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stuie wrote:Smurf - i was always told that 'tits like coconuts' - sorry mods I bet that gets pulled!!!
That's OK Stuie, it's an easy mistake to make!
No. It's Swallows that like Coconuts! but only the African ones, the European Swallow couldn't carry a Coconut!
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Rank: Super forum user
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Sean - I've only just read through this thread after being busy all day and evening yesterday. Though I can't readily think of anything witty to add to it myself thank you for starting it and also to the responders for the wit and humour which made me laugh out loud - or LOL as some might put it. Do you and any of the responders happen to work part time as stand-up comedians by any chance?! :-)
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Rank: Super forum user
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'Well my boss is a comedian - my wages are joke' - BOOM BOOM!!!
GROAN!!
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Rank: Moderator 
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We are advised by government sources that all the panic has now been sold, the heat has gone out of the pasty case and savoury starling stew was banned.
We have therefore concluded that it is time to lock this Friday topic.
IOSH Moderating Team
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