Just over a week ago my daughter was married and as customary I gave the 'Father of the Bride' speech. Being a true safety professional I couldn't let the safety hat be removed and I hereby share the speech for future fathers to borrow / embellish in future. I sign off now for Xmas and wish everyone well for the new year ...
Wedding Speech
Remember: Stand up to be seen... Speak up to be heard... Sit down to be appreciated!
HAVE A DRINK TO HAND
Here’s the mother of the brides’ speech – so called due to the heavy editing by the brides mother!!! =O}}
When standing before a group of people as a safety officer, I'm usually giving safety talks covering manual handling, chemical hazard assessments and the like – so please bear with me whilst I run through this risk assessment.
The risk assessment process better known as the Father of the Bride speech has 4 areas to cover.
Stage 1) The Hazard identification or The Greeting - Good afternoon and how do you do. (Offer a theatrical hand shake)
On behalf of my wife xxxx and myself, we would like to welcome you to this gathering and thank you for coming to this very special occasion to celebrate the marriage of our daughter Judith to Ben.
Firstly, I would like to say what a pleasure meet Ben’s parents - Dave and Barbara, again and of course all the friends and relatives of both families who have literally travelled far to be here today.
A big thank you also goes to Judith & Ben who had very definite ideas on how they wanted today to be. Through their planning and tireless efforts they have made today (8th December 2013), here in Lapland / Finland, a memorable day for everyone. I must at this moment also make a special mention of Absent Friends back at home who could not make it to the wedding.
A toast to: Absent Friends.
Stage 2) Who are affected & potential Hazards or A few balanced words about the Bride & Groom.
I cannot begin to tell you how delighted I am to see our daughter, Judith, looking so radiant as she begins a new chapter of her life - as wife and partner of Ben. I know I'm also speaking for xxxx when I say we are not losing Judith; we are merely entrusting her to Ben's care. And as we have come to know Ben well over the last few years, we have arrived at the inescapable conclusion that this will be very first-rate care.
As parents we are obviously proud of Judith and pleased to see her looking so happy today and in Judith we see an independent, beautiful young woman who is a wonderful daughter, who has provided us with much joy and laughter over the years and throughout her life, she has always been ready to face a challenge. Some would say, however, that she’s about to face her biggest challenge of all... [PAUSE]
Bio hazards – they can be found in all walks of life and in this instance my first memory is of my daughter [PAUSE… think on it] my first memory is of my daughter is of her at five minutes old being thrust into my arms whilst her mother was feeling rather ill at the time (throwing up), since then father and daughter have been having hugs ever since. The next memory is of her at around three years of age running up and down the garden in her red wellies, tripping up and doing a swan dive good enough to score a try with, (there are rumours this is how she fell for Ben) after that things became a blur of rapid growth into the stunning bride you see before you, which brings me to the other half of this partnership.
When at university Judith started mentioning someone by the name of Ben and how well they were getting on with each other. Naturally a father is protective of his daughter so my first thoughts were, would he be a 6 stone weakling or a classic punk with full Mohican, covered in tattoos? Thankfully it wasn't so, but had she found Mr Perfect, sadly not and my worst fears came to past … he’s a football supporter and a Millwall one at that. Oh well, nobody’s perfect!
Stage 3) Safety Controls or Advice to the happy couple.
There are many instances where the Health and Safety at Work etc. Act 1974 clause 7 applies whereby it states – it shall be the duty of every one (employee)… to take reasonable care for the Health and Safety of himself and that of others who may be affected by their actions or omissions … so, no matter what you do or say, you get it wrong and you’re stuffed either way Ben …
Well Trudy & I have been together for 30 years, and I haven't got a clue how we did it or what the secret is!! One thing for sure, we never gave up.
I thought I would relate marriage to the Tour de France - This is a long journey of 3650 km, with quick wins – namely the Sprints, hectic days relying on each other for a fast win – the Team Time Trials and with plenty of Hurdles along the way – the mountain stages and it repeats year in and year out, but as long as you strive and work as a Team you will achieve the success you truly deserve.
• Marriage is also remembering to say 'I love you' at least once a day & never being too old to hold hands as time goes by.
• Marriage is not only marrying the right person, but also being the right partner.
Individual advice -
To Judith - Judith when you want something from Ben, just ask for it - don't forget he's a man and subtle hints don't work!! Men see things in 16 bit colour scheme of things not 256 like you girls do, to us fellas there's no such colour as mocha; magnolia or fuchsia, try brown, cream or pink instead.
To Ben –
When Manual Handling and about to pick Judith up and carry her over the threshold, remember to assess the load – top or bottom heavy, get a good grip and bend the knees prior to picking up … [PAUSE] So Ben, remember there is no challenge in a marriage that cannot be overcome by one or more of the following:
Ok, I was wrong; Ok, You were right; Yes Dear; No Dear and the most important - OK love! Just buy it – [PAUSE] failing that a bad memory seems to work, except of course where birthdays and anniversaries are involved …. and a man who gives in when he's wrong is a wise man: A man who gives in when he's right....is well, married. Finally, old married couples seem know that the secret of a successful marriage is patience, tolerance, forgiveness and more patience!
Stage 4) The assessment close out or The Toast - The easy bit!
My final duty and very great privilege is to formally welcome Ben to our family then to propose a toast to our daughter and our new son-in law.
Judith & Ben -
Here’s to the past, for all that you’ve learned. Here’s to the present, for all that you share. Here’s to the future, for all that you look forward to, together. May life abundantly bless you both; may you live as long as you wish and have all that you need as long as you live; May the road you choose be smooth and your burdens be light; May your joy be everlasting and may all your headaches be.....[TAKE A DRINK] caused by champagne!!
Ladies and Gentlemen,
Please stand and join me
We have a radiant bride, we have a handsome groom,
Strike up your glasses with me as they drink from the cup of friendship, with your vessels filled to the brim, for their love is good and life is long and these two are best together.
I GIVE YOU, Judith and Ben, the toast is THE BRIDE AND GROOM.