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Posted By Andy Walker
My personal Planning Supervisor (Mrs W) decided that our little boys/girls room would benifit from the addition of one of those squiry things that mask certain odours. Without consultation she purchased 2 different types of the aforemention article. I was then tasked with the fitting of them and after discussion mounted them in what appeared to be a suitable location.
To get to the point one of the Devils machines is angled so the first time I pressed it it got me straight in the face.
I wonder what PPE I should specify to future visitors to my abode? Full face visor or just goggles?
Andrew W
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Posted By J Knight
Full BA if you ask me,
John
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Posted By Andrew Cartridge
Declare an Environmental Incident, isolate the area, get statements from thse concerned, inform EA, repair hole in ozone layer, go to pub, get drunk, fall over.
Andy
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Posted By lewes
As its a Friday: 10 THOUGHTS FOR TODAY
10 - Life is sexually transmitted.
9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see one without an erection, make him a sandwich.
7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
6 - Some people are like a Slinky... Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
5 - Health freaks are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you 50 quid and a substantial tax cut saves you 50p?
2 - In the 60s, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006:
We know exactly where any untaxed car is located among the millions of cars in Britain......
But we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants
and Terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the DVLA in charge of
Immigration......
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Posted By Chris Packham
Following on from the last posting, I was once told by a medic that: "Life is a sexually transmitted, invariably fatal condition."
Given this, why not follow Merv's approach and enjoy the food etc. whilst you can. I'll now go and pour myself that Lagavulin and sit out in the sun whilst I enjoy it.
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Posted By Lorraine Shuker
This email issued by an anon H&S person
"Please do not remove the owl placed on the window sill of the break room, its purpose is to discourage the pigeons from congregating there.
With bird flu in the headlines as health and safety officer I am mindful that the birds need keeping at bay.
This is a humane way of moving them"
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Posted By Andy Walker
Joking aside, at a previous employer I was involved in a meeting where 3/4 of an hour was spent discussing where to purchase a stuffed owl to fix to the top of a crane to discourage Pied Wagtails!!!
Andrew W
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Posted By Merv Newman
It must be Friday.
Pied and yellow wagtails normally fly within 10 meters of ground level. They would rarely get to the height of a crane. (mechanical, not feathered type)And I can't really see a wagtail causing harm to a crane (mechanical or feathered)
Owls do not hunt other birds. (maybe fledglings) Their principal prey is small mammals and insects.
Really sounds like a typically wasted management meeting.
Thank god It's Friday.
Merv
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Posted By Andrew W
But Merv this is management we're talking about. Since when did correct facts get in the way of a good action plan?
Andrew W
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