Posted By The toecap
Have IOSH sponsored the world conker championships? Is it true?

Posted By The toecap
I hope they have goggles on and Kevlar suits and gloves on and the area is cordoned off and all other stuff. They are supervised their must be a doctor to hand and a helicopter standing by.

Posted By Robert K Lewis
Holmzey

I presume the real imitation has a brittle outer shell designed to crack when hit sufficiently hard and expose a firm white inner part which shears in some way to give fragmentation and ultimate failure.

We could actually grow a real substitute imitation on trees!!:-)

Bob

Posted By holmezy
Rob,
you are surely not suggesting that we could actually grow authentic origional imitation type conkers? What....on trees? Thats just silly! All those prickly outer cases, having to throw sticks up to dislodge them, the risk of falling objects ( stick and conker) hitting someones head, encouraging small children to climb trees and the risk of falls, not to mention that horrible brown stain that you get on your hands from opening too many conkers.....just plain daft! No, we should all be trying to make the world a safer place and the new "conker" does just that. Never get "being safe" and "having fun" mixed up, they are 2 completely different concepts and should never be combined.

Barrie,

read again...that problem has already been designed out with the impact resistant and shatterproof outer layer. Even the hole for the string is moulded in so there's no risk of stab or puncture wounds when drilling or scewering the conker. As far as I can see the only draw back is that it makes a game of conkers go on,,,and on,,,and on,,,and on.......


Holmezy

(I'm sure its not Friday,,,is it)

Posted By Robert K Lewis
Holmzey

Without breakage however they are a potential projectile of some magnitude. Surely the risk of a 25-50mm ball hitting a child and causing serious injury is far greater than throwing sticks and jumping on prickly outer cases put together. Climbing trees is not solely limited to genuine imitation conkers, it relates to cherries, pears, apples and all manner of fruit - perhaps 5 a day is not so healthy after all!!!

Environmentally as well your real substitute will cause major climatological changes and use of scarce resources. My genuine imitation substitutes would absorb CO2 and be self replicating.

Bob

Posted By holmezy
Lilian,

The idea of IOSH, or any other safety organisation entering a team is just a non starter. There's no suggestion that IOSH members would have any unfair advantage or be looked upon more favourably in the draw, with an easier route to the final. The idea of so many safety professionals all gathered in one place, having a good time and enjoying themselves would be just too much for the general public and press to handle. On the day of the competition I intend to sit in a quiet room and read a book. I do not intend to allow myself to get drawn into participating in such a dangerous sport, and if it isn't classified as dangerous, it jolly well ought to be.

Rob,

Yes, you've got a point re the solid projectile theory. I've spoken to the designers and they have come up with a plan to produce authentic imitation comkers out of a sponge type material to cut down on the weight issue, so any impact injury would be avoided, (and also solve any manual handling issues that would surely have been raised by the press).

I think we are finally getting there.

Holmezy

(oh and Friday is getting closer by the second)

Posted By Barrie (Badger) Etter
Holmzey
Allowing for redesign, re my previous comments, I know of a lass who breaks out in a rash plus breathing difficulties if she walks into a room where ANY form of latex has been wafted about prviously. Use of laxatives ... I mean latex alternatives required.

Merv
TPO good idea but need to get tree surgeons on the job first to make sure they haven't been affected by the fungus that's blighting them presently. No tree, nowhere to hang you imatation conkers.

Badger

Posted By NSO
Perhaps a good reason for a GM crop. Grown without the prickly, bitter tasting outer shell. All at low level where they could be picked avoiding the obligatory launching of sticks and branch shaking.

Posted By Anne Smart
Dear all,

The official announcement about our sponsorship of the World Conker Championships has just been posted in the news centre.
More details about our involvement will follow within the next few weeks. If you want to enter, you need to get your forms in quickly before all the places are snapped up. Click on www.worldconkerchampionships.com for entry information.

Anne Smart, IOSH media and campaigns co-ordinator

Posted By Anne Smart
Holmezy (and anyone else thinking of entering the championships),

I should probably tell you that you can't enter the competition using your own conkers - Ashton Conker Club supply them all ready-laced to ensure fair play.

'Authentic imitation conkers' won't be allowed - sorry! It's all about the technique anyway.

Anne Smart, IOSH media and camapigns co-ordinator

Posted By Merv Newman
To be reallyreally fringe you would have to substitute water (sterilised/filtered/demineralised) filled non-latex balloons for those dangerouse conkers.

Merv

Posted By steve e ashton
before anyone else asks.

No, I do not run a conker club.

But if I did, I would have to charge competitors for all the quality controls on the conkers supplied, not to mention the MEWP hire costs and etc...

Nearly Friday?

Steve (Ashton)

Posted By Rebecca Donaldson
Holmezy

The English Tiddlywinks Association may be able to help
www.etwa.org

Rebecca

Posted By holmezy
Seano,

see Anne's response. Don't get too excited and start buffing up your conkers just yet!
Apparently conkers are provided and they are pre-strung, complete with suitable knots. Its not clear if you get to pick one that especially appeals to you or whether you are allocated a conker on arrival. I'm pretty sure they are all newbies in terms of conker fights, unless of course some have seen battle before and are suitable rated as a "37er" or even "defending champion".

Holmezy

Posted By Heather Collins
Are "stampsies" allowed in the official rules? For the uninitiated this is where if you let go of the string and your conker goes on the floor, your opponent may stamp on it. Clearly the risk of having your hand stamped on as you dive to retrieve your conker is considerable....

Posted By Robert K Lewis
I always thought the gentlemanly thing to do was to round up the conker, when it drops to the floor, with some large pliers or a handy Nutcracker and then hand it back. Shucks the world has moved on.

Bob:-)

Posted By holmezy

Ray,

although I am not an expert in the art of conkering, (although the drivel I have been spouting lately may lead some to beleive the opposite is true),,,,,,
I can inform you that every "conkerer" goes into each tournament with a plan. Whether its a cunning one or not, is undecided. Conkering is not just about "giving it a good wallop". There are specific weak spots on every conker, the trick is to work out where they are and then plan your attack taking into consideration factors such as trajectory, angles, velocity, point of impact, wind conditions and humidity to name a few.
Experienced "conkerers", or "Williams" as they are known within the sport, have the knack of identifying their opponents weakness and shamelessly exploiting them.

Holmezy

Now its Friday....let the games begin!!

Posted By holmezy
Ted,

nice to hear from you again. Thought you were more of a fisherman rather than a conkerer?

I beleive the occasion you are referring to was the European Conker Championships of 1066, that were held in Hastings? If I am correct, then this was the only time that the title, King of Conkers, was won by a foriegner? I beleive that, although William was English, he had spent a bit of time working in France and had gained citizenship and thus competed under the French flag, even though he was actually English? Typically, when he became champion, we (the English) then claimed him as our own and found him a cushy number back in blighty running the country. King William the Conkerer, to give him his proper title defended his title successfully for about 11 years or so. I think the French then got mardy and decided not to enter the competition again. In later years, the Germans did enter a token effort, and although they made it to the final rounds, did not manage to be victorious. I think a bloke called Churchill beat them in the final of 1946?
And also, that tragic eye injury in 1066 gave rise to the modern day "Conker Risk Assessment Proceedure" which is known by its initials, and is what I have been talking about in this topic from the start. Since then, there have been no reported lost time injuries in the sport so in a way William was the fore father of Health and Safety in Conkers

Ever since then, the English have continued to claim victorious foreigners as their own, for example Greg Resedski in the girly game of tennis, Kevin Pieterson in the pastime of cricket

If he realy is your great uncle, then you must be very old.

Holmezy

Soon be the weekend....beer time!